😡 Once Upon a Time There Was an Angry Child
Oct 16, 2023
*Once upon a time, a child felt angry.
* A valid emotion adults feel all of the time.
The child didn’t have sufficient brain development to regulate the anger, or the language to communicate how they were feeling, so they lashed out and threw their toy against the wall.
The child’s parents yelled,
“DON’T YOU DARE DO THAT AGAIN! GIVE ME THAT TOY! I’M PUTTING IT IN THE BIN!”
The yelling escalated the situation.
The child finally found their calm but felt unheard, unseen and alone. The child had to apologise for being angry and lashing out.
The child was provided with nothing to help them do better next time, other than to suppress their emotions and that there were no alternatives to how they behaved.
Emotion refers to the feelings and internal states a child experiences, such as frustration, anger, fear, or sadness. Behaviour, on the other hand, refers to the outward actions and expressions that result from those emotions, which may include screaming, crying, hitting, or other disruptive behaviours.
It's essential we acknowledge and validate our child's emotions. Letting our child know that it's okay to feel upset or angry helps them learn that their emotions are normal and acceptable.
While it's important to validate emotions, it’s also important we address the disruptive behaviour separately. This means focusing on the action or behaviour that is not acceptable while still recognizing and respecting the underlying emotion.
"I understand that you're angry, hitting is not an okay way to express that."
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